posts in
opinion
Life Expectations
4/06/2014
There are days where I just need to share my thoughts and opinions. This will be a very sentimental and personal post...I had the time and the inspiration for it. For those who don't like this, don't worry - reviews and beauty posts will comeback next week as usual.
After answering one of the questions made on my last post and the reaction that a fellow friend had (Thank you Emi !) I felt I had to share a bit more. I'll be turning 21 this year. Back when I was a teenager I thought that if I were single at this age it would be a nightmare and my life wouldn't make sense. Pretty much because I was living according to other expectations and life's...oh and because I was still dealing with a hugeee lack of self-steam and self-love. Yes. Bullying.
Bullying is something that, until this day, I will never understand. It all started when I got my first pair of glasses. Yes, you read it right. I have sight problems since I was a little girl and it's something I couldn't run from since it's pretty much genetic - my dad, my grandparents, grandaunts, cousins , all of them need to use glasses. It's not the end of the world. But apparently to those people, it gave them the power to pick on me. When they finally understood that picking on that wasn't ok, they would choose something else (my horrible hair - which at the time, because I didn't had the knowledge, wasn't exactly the prettiest; my reading tastes - apparently liking Dan Brown at 12 years of age isn't nice because I have to read what the rest of the kids read ; liking anime and manga - because "you don't understand anything" or "it's for kids" (of course...Tsubasa OVAS are really appropriate for kids...) and a bunch of other things).
My self-steam was really low. The only thing that prevented me from getting into really bad relationships was the fact that everybody would say "you need to get a boyfriend" and the last thing I had was my really huge stubbornness (thank you grandma for that, it's a lovely trait) because I would say "no, I DON'T WANT to get a boyfriend". Specially because I was 13 and had perfect clear in my mind that I was still way too young for that.
With high school and a new environment, I finally let myself go. I had this huge crush on a boy from my English class. The problem was, I was still dealing with scaring from bullying. I didn't know how to deal with people sometimes. So I would act crazy every time I saw him - I would froze. not be able to talk normally with him , I would shiver if he walked next to me...Crazy I know, but I was really young and was also dealing with problems at home. But in the end, when I - in a very clumsy way, which I don't recommend anyone - decided to tell my feelings, I ended up being played by one of his friends.
I ended up getting blocked. It was too much for me.To cope with that, Kpop was what I would invest in. I was lucky enough, at the time Run Devil Run, Go Away and other powerful songs had been released, so my playlist was interesting. I started to get curious about their looks and I found my way into Youtube and beauty videos.
When high school ended, I was already in a transitioning phase. I wasn't that little girl that would keep things for herself. (I actually had to stand up against a bully during the last days of school. Better than that, was having friend that would back me up and say "you know what? that's wrong, you are wrong, back off" ).
But to keep good friends, bad ones had to go. I had this "best friend" that was acting...strange. You know when people say something, preach it 500 times, don't want to have it done to themselves but do it to others? Yeah.It got to the point were we had to stop. We argued about something and she wanted me to say that she was right, when I couldn't. She decided to act like a child and I let her go. Best thing ever.
With this break, I was able to explore other fields, talk with other friends and re-evaluate what friendship is, what I needed in a friendship and what changes I had to do. Nowadays I have an amazing relationship with my best friend. There are things were we don't agree and it's okay - we talk about like adults and even when we argue, 2 hours later, it's nothing. And no matter what, we are here for each other. We always know how the other thinks and reacts - which is funny, specially when there are other involved. We don't say yes to everything, but we also don't crash and make one another feel bad.
The other girl? Well...she wanted to revive our friendship but I pushed her back. I knew she hadn't grown up (in fact, she didn't at all, she still acts like before....high school is over you know? ) and that it would be a matter of time until we would be in another fight. I made a good decision and I truly feel sorry for her.
So, why am I writing this? People always have expectations and mould others around their one expectations. According to a lot of people, I'm a failure because I never had a relationship and a guy telling me "yeah, you're pretty". Guess what, I'm not.
Over the time, I found self-steam, I found that I can love myself - not in a narcissistic way okay? - I found that I have amazing and strong people in my life. I found out that I don't need to have another person to define myself. Yes, I would love to find someone to Love, don't get it wrong. But I want to do it when it's right and okay and when I find the right person. I won't be jumping to the first guys that shows up. No, sorry. I won't engaging a relationship to forget A or B. No, Sorry.
I'm a different person, I am who I am.
The boy from my high school crush? He is living his life happily. I only wish him all the luck in the world and I now know that, even if he had said "oh okay, let's start something", it wouldn't go too far. We are way too different - he likes to party and attend discos, I like to stay at home and wait for Kpop videos. I would end up hurt and anyway - with or without relationship.
(photo from here )
The previous photo resumes what I feel. (thank you Disney for creating Elsa!). I don't want to be defined by if I have or not a boyfriend. I rather be defined by who I am. I'm the girl that loves to write until late at night. I'm the girl that love to listen to music until late (on my MP3, don't worry). I'm the girl that love to read and constantly likes to stalk her aunts book stock. I like to search for Dr.Phill episodes and Documentaries about North Korea. I like to know other cultures and languages. I'm someone that has a lot to offer but I won't give it to the first person that show up. They have to earn it, just like I earn my self-steam back. I sound harsh, but I don't want to get hurt. As soon as I see that that person is playing me, I'll stop it.
During the Architecture Semester, there was this guy that I thought it was a nice one and that I might end up having something else. We started this nice...friendship? Anyway...things got strange. So that you can understand, on a Monday he would say "oh I don't like A, I would never have anything to do with her" and talk about his girlfriend; on Tuesday he would say "oh my ex this, my ex that", on Wednesday he would say how he might want to have a relation with A and on Friday he would spend his time with A and ignore me. So, on the next week I would get away from him...and than he would come after me for attention. This went on and off until after talking with a friend and Christmas break, it wasn't good. He probably didn't know what he wanted in the first place and, I shouldn't waiting for him. I let it go and it was the best thing I did.
I wanted to share this really huge piece of words with you. I'm sorry if I've scared you, it wasn't my intention...Above anything, I'm glad that I am who I am. I know that the right person will eventually show up. I just hope that he gets to understand my Harry Potter references.
During the Architecture Semester, there was this guy that I thought it was a nice one and that I might end up having something else. We started this nice...friendship? Anyway...things got strange. So that you can understand, on a Monday he would say "oh I don't like A, I would never have anything to do with her" and talk about his girlfriend; on Tuesday he would say "oh my ex this, my ex that", on Wednesday he would say how he might want to have a relation with A and on Friday he would spend his time with A and ignore me. So, on the next week I would get away from him...and than he would come after me for attention. This went on and off until after talking with a friend and Christmas break, it wasn't good. He probably didn't know what he wanted in the first place and, I shouldn't waiting for him. I let it go and it was the best thing I did.
I wanted to share this really huge piece of words with you. I'm sorry if I've scared you, it wasn't my intention...Above anything, I'm glad that I am who I am. I know that the right person will eventually show up. I just hope that he gets to understand my Harry Potter references.
The Ugly Side of Make Up...
2/22/2014
...the side of the counterfeited make up.
I've been thinking a lot if I should or not write this post. It's a really hard topic for some people. Specially when I'm point out why they should get that garbage that they call "nice and safe replica".
So yes, I'm against replicas/counterfeited make up. I'm sorry but I can't support something like that, by any means. The excuse of "people with less someone have the right of having nice products" can't be used with counterfeited make up. I get that not everyone can afford a Naked Palette, but why get a fake one when you can get a dupe from MUA?
You know, I'm sick and tired of watching bloggers and youtubers talking about fake products and "how they look like the original" sorry, but they don't. Their performance isn't the same and the ingredients aren't the same. Oh and I also love the excuse of "I just talked about it because they offered me the products and the partnership". Oh, so if they offered you an atomic al bomb, you would talk about it? How nice. I get the "don't judge your similar", "don't judge people like that", but with this is kinda hard. Shouldn't bloggers manage their partnership better? It's not the first time that I ignore/delete bad partnership proposals. So yeah, Counterfeited partnerships are one of those.
So yes, I don't support counterfeited Make up, cosmetic products, clothes, accessories and pretty much everything that's counterfeited. I'm sorry but I can't support it.
Specially because,the money and time that people spend buying that garbage, they could have spent on researching nice alternatives. Some times they are even cheaper than the "so look-a-like replica". Why buying a fake Chanel dress when Zara and H&M make pretty similar dupes? Oh I forgot, you wouldn't have the pretty and shiny fake logo and packaging to show. Because to me, it's what people many times go after. I've actually seen some bloggers trying to pass out fake Naked Palettes as real ones claiming "how they bought them on Sephora"...like no. With a bit of research you'll see that the palette shown would never be sold in Sephora, Urban Decay or any other official store.
Oh, did I also mention that in many countries Counterfeited make up isn't legal and buying it and selling it is a crime? Sadly my Country isn't really into the Counterfeited make up industry - they usually target clothes, Cd's and Dvd's - but who knows, they might start to look at it.
So yes, I don't like replicas and I don't like or follow blogs that talk about it. Sorry but I can't and I won't do it. I'm one of those persons that prefers to not have it to have one that might place my health in danger.
Really guys, I wish I could have a 9 drawer Alex full with make up. I can't. What I do instead is besides saving money and getting the most expensive products during the most festive times - like my Birthday and Christmas - I also look after promotions and budget friendly options (Like Etude House Lipsticks vs MAC lipsticks) or how I bought my Naked 3 palette and my Cream Eyeshadow from Benefit with 25% off. I can't have it all and it's okay.
I wish I could have a closet filled with Louboutin shoes and Chanel Bags. But I can't. But who know? Maybe one day I'll have a job that will allow me that so for now, I'm pretty happy with my Seaside Shoes and my Accesorize and Parfois Bags.
So, if you feel offended with my post, I'm sorry. If you don't want to follow me anymore, feel free to. Don't take this post as a personal atack. It may look like one but, this is me expression how I feel about this topic.
Just don't ask me to pat to back and say "oh yes, that fake Naked palette is a really good deal". Just don't.
Also, I wish that Cosmetic brands would work better around this issue. Shutting down stores and suing who runs those stores. Or making sure that even if people buy the products, they are never able to receive them. It's time to stop this non-sense.
Take care everyone.
I've been thinking a lot if I should or not write this post. It's a really hard topic for some people. Specially when I'm point out why they should get that garbage that they call "nice and safe replica".
So yes, I'm against replicas/counterfeited make up. I'm sorry but I can't support something like that, by any means. The excuse of "people with less someone have the right of having nice products" can't be used with counterfeited make up. I get that not everyone can afford a Naked Palette, but why get a fake one when you can get a dupe from MUA?
Wait, what's a dupe an why isn't a problem get it ?Dupes are products that are similar to others. Usually they cheaper alternatives to high end products. They aren't copies or try to pretend that they are something else. Usually we - bloggers - are the ones who make the comparisons and say "Undress me is a dupe to the Naked palette" or "Demerara from Sleek is a dupe to Nars Seduction". Also, the formulas are never the same, you can see some differences in therms of texture and colours a bit on or a bit off. They are safer because they are tested in competent laboratories and they are legal. If for instants you have a problem, you can actually complain to the brand or to your health department what happened. With a fake item? You can't complain to anyone.
You know, I'm sick and tired of watching bloggers and youtubers talking about fake products and "how they look like the original" sorry, but they don't. Their performance isn't the same and the ingredients aren't the same. Oh and I also love the excuse of "I just talked about it because they offered me the products and the partnership". Oh, so if they offered you an atomic al bomb, you would talk about it? How nice. I get the "don't judge your similar", "don't judge people like that", but with this is kinda hard. Shouldn't bloggers manage their partnership better? It's not the first time that I ignore/delete bad partnership proposals. So yeah, Counterfeited partnerships are one of those.
So yes, I don't support counterfeited Make up, cosmetic products, clothes, accessories and pretty much everything that's counterfeited. I'm sorry but I can't support it.
Specially because,the money and time that people spend buying that garbage, they could have spent on researching nice alternatives. Some times they are even cheaper than the "so look-a-like replica". Why buying a fake Chanel dress when Zara and H&M make pretty similar dupes? Oh I forgot, you wouldn't have the pretty and shiny fake logo and packaging to show. Because to me, it's what people many times go after. I've actually seen some bloggers trying to pass out fake Naked Palettes as real ones claiming "how they bought them on Sephora"...like no. With a bit of research you'll see that the palette shown would never be sold in Sephora, Urban Decay or any other official store.
Oh, did I also mention that in many countries Counterfeited make up isn't legal and buying it and selling it is a crime? Sadly my Country isn't really into the Counterfeited make up industry - they usually target clothes, Cd's and Dvd's - but who knows, they might start to look at it.
So yes, I don't like replicas and I don't like or follow blogs that talk about it. Sorry but I can't and I won't do it. I'm one of those persons that prefers to not have it to have one that might place my health in danger.
Really guys, I wish I could have a 9 drawer Alex full with make up. I can't. What I do instead is besides saving money and getting the most expensive products during the most festive times - like my Birthday and Christmas - I also look after promotions and budget friendly options (Like Etude House Lipsticks vs MAC lipsticks) or how I bought my Naked 3 palette and my Cream Eyeshadow from Benefit with 25% off. I can't have it all and it's okay.
I wish I could have a closet filled with Louboutin shoes and Chanel Bags. But I can't. But who know? Maybe one day I'll have a job that will allow me that so for now, I'm pretty happy with my Seaside Shoes and my Accesorize and Parfois Bags.
So, if you feel offended with my post, I'm sorry. If you don't want to follow me anymore, feel free to. Don't take this post as a personal atack. It may look like one but, this is me expression how I feel about this topic.
Just don't ask me to pat to back and say "oh yes, that fake Naked palette is a really good deal". Just don't.
Also, I wish that Cosmetic brands would work better around this issue. Shutting down stores and suing who runs those stores. Or making sure that even if people buy the products, they are never able to receive them. It's time to stop this non-sense.
Take care everyone.
Diana.
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