Can you believe it? We are already in June!! I was not able to blog much in May due to a mix of personal problems, work load at college and having health problems (specially allergies) to take care. I really want to resume regular blogging between the end of this month and July. I cannot promise a concrete date due to pending evaluations for this semester's courses. 

In more recent days, I've realised that we should pay attention to the simple things in life. I mean...I don't need a new lipstick or a new blush to make me happy. Simpler things can turn a gloomy day into something exciting and good. As Dumbledore days : 

“Happiness can be found, even in the darkest of times, if one only remembers to turn on the light.” 

So here are 10 things that make me happy and why.

1. Hanging out with my Friends.

This one sounds like a cliché I know but it is true. There are two people in my life that make my days brighter everyday. It doesn't matter if there's a whole storm on the other side, they will just take out the clouds and make me see the Sun and the Blue sky that lies on the other side.

2. Sunny Days.

It may seem as something stupid, but I tend to have a better mood if it's sunny instead than clouds or rain. Rain tends to make want to stay at home, which isn't bad but something isn't really the ideal situation. When it's sunny I like to walk around in the nature and be active. Still sounds silly, but is indeed one of the things that makes me happy.

3. Walking Around.

It doesn't matter if it is through Lisbon, through my hometown or through parks and nature, walking tends to help me. Whenever I have free time I just enjoy walking. Even the other day, instead of just looking to nothing I decided to took a walk around the Gulbenkian Garden and it was the best thing I could do. Walking is pretty much the closest thing I have to meditation - I also organize my thoughts and ideas while walking around. I really intend to keep doing it, more and more!

4. Watching Disney Movies

This one is really silly, but it is quite true. Whenever I am more unhappy, there's nothing like watching a Disney movie - have you watched Zootopia? It's really cute and amazing! I totally recommend it!!. Something we need to go back in order to move further in a better way. But hey, the past stays in the past, otherwise Rafiki might show up a little angry at some point. ( I guess I'm worse than Grey Worm from Game of Thrones at making jokes, ain't I? )

5.Reading on Underground/Subway
Reading while walking around inside the lines of the Underground/Subway. I don't really know why but it's just something I like to do. I also like to read while travelling with my family - some people say that I shouldn't do this because I'll get dizzy...But I never did...
The only downside of this is when I am laughing my lungs out of some really funny part - like Dumbledore saying that his scar looks like the Underground Map? - and having people looking at me and thinking "that girl must have a problem". But it's worth it!
6. Music
Music has been something that helps me with having a more positive look to life and days. For example, whenever I am stressed with something or I really need to focus on work, I tend to listen to the Ori and the Blind Forest Soundtrack. It's one of the most relaxing things I can do and I truly recommend it to any one.
But there are other genres that can also lift my mood. Kpop has been a staple for years in my playing - lately I've been listening to BTS and Red Velvet a lot. Also, I had a really funny moment while Skyping with friends - I was listening to the English Version of ONE OK ROCK's and let's say...I really enjoyed Mighty Long Fall a little too much. (I'm not ashamed, it's my favourite song and I was happy, that's all that matters)
 
 




7. The Sound and Smell of the Sea.
If you follow my instagram you know I love to visit the seaside. It's somehow relaxing and helps reflect and have a positive perspective on things. Nowadays I try to go there at least once a month and I don't regret it. It's the best thing I have done. Seriously, if you can, go to the beach/seaside. Sit near ( but safely) the Ocean and breath that amazing air. It's pure Heaven.

So, what makes you happy? I hope you guys enjoyed this post. It feels nice to write something different here, once in a while. Life isn't just made of skin care and lipsticks. Take care, have a nice day!

There are days where I just need to share my thoughts and opinions. This will be a very sentimental and personal post...I had the time and the inspiration for it. For those who don't like this, don't worry - reviews and beauty posts will comeback next week as usual. 

After answering one of the questions made on my last post and the reaction that a fellow friend had (Thank you Emi !) I felt I had to share a bit more. I'll be turning 21 this year. Back when I was a teenager I thought that if I were single at this age it would be a nightmare and my life wouldn't make sense. Pretty much because I was living according to other expectations and life's...oh and because I was still dealing with a hugeee lack of self-steam and self-love. Yes. Bullying. 

Bullying is something that, until this day, I will never understand. It all started when I got my first pair of glasses. Yes, you read it right. I have sight problems since I was a little girl and it's something I couldn't run from since it's pretty much genetic - my dad, my grandparents, grandaunts, cousins , all of them need to use glasses. It's not the end of the world. But apparently to those people, it gave them the power to pick on me. When they finally understood that picking on that wasn't ok, they would choose something else (my horrible hair - which at the time, because I didn't had the knowledge, wasn't exactly the prettiest; my reading tastes - apparently liking Dan Brown at 12 years of age isn't nice because I have to read what the rest of the kids read ; liking anime and manga - because "you don't understand anything" or "it's for kids" (of course...Tsubasa OVAS are really appropriate for kids...) and a bunch of other things). 

My self-steam was really low. The only thing that prevented me from getting into really bad relationships was the fact that everybody would say "you need to get a boyfriend" and the last thing I had was my really huge stubbornness (thank you grandma for that, it's a lovely trait) because I would say "no, I DON'T WANT to get a boyfriend". Specially because I was 13 and had perfect clear in my mind that I was still way too young for that. 

With high school and a new environment, I finally let myself go. I had this huge crush on a boy from my English class. The problem was, I was still dealing with scaring from bullying. I didn't know how to deal with people sometimes. So I would act crazy every time I saw him - I would froze. not be able to talk normally with him , I would shiver if he walked next to me...Crazy I know, but I was really young and was also dealing with problems at home. But in the end, when I - in a very clumsy way, which I don't recommend anyone - decided to tell my feelings, I ended up being played by one of his friends. 

I ended up getting blocked. It was too much for me.To cope with that, Kpop was what I would invest in. I was lucky enough, at the time Run Devil Run, Go Away and other powerful songs had been released, so my playlist was interesting. I started to get curious about their looks and I found my way into Youtube and beauty videos. 

When high school ended, I was already in a transitioning phase. I wasn't that little girl that would keep things for herself. (I actually had to stand up against a bully during the last days of school. Better than that, was having friend that would back me up and say "you know what? that's wrong, you are wrong, back off" ). 

But to keep good friends, bad ones had to go. I had this "best friend" that was acting...strange. You know when people say something, preach it 500 times, don't want to have it done to themselves but do it to others? Yeah.It got to the point were we had to stop. We argued about something and she wanted me to say that she was right, when I couldn't. She decided to act like a child and I let her go. Best thing ever. 

With this break, I was able to explore other fields, talk with other friends and re-evaluate what friendship is, what I needed in a friendship and what changes I had to do. Nowadays I have an amazing relationship with my best friend. There are things were we don't agree and it's okay - we talk about like adults and even when we argue, 2 hours later, it's nothing. And no matter what, we are here for each other. We always know how the other thinks and reacts - which is funny, specially when there are other involved. We don't say yes to everything, but we also don't crash and make one another feel bad. 

The other girl? Well...she wanted to revive our friendship but I pushed her back. I knew she hadn't grown up (in fact, she didn't at all, she still acts like before....high school is over you know? ) and that it would be a matter of time until we would be in another fight. I made a good decision and I truly feel sorry for her. 

So, why am I writing this? People always have expectations and mould others around their one expectations. According to a lot of people, I'm a failure because I never had a relationship and a guy telling me "yeah, you're pretty". Guess what, I'm not.

Over the time, I found self-steam, I found that I can love myself - not in a narcissistic way okay? - I found that I have amazing and strong people in my life. I found out that I don't need to have another person to define myself. Yes, I would love to find someone to Love, don't get it wrong. But I want to do it when it's right and okay and when I find the right person. I won't be jumping to the first guys that shows up. No, sorry. I won't engaging a relationship to forget A or B. No, Sorry. 

I'm a different person, I am who I am. 

The boy from my high school crush? He is living his life happily. I only wish him all the luck in the world and I now know that, even if he had said "oh okay, let's start something", it wouldn't go too far. We are way too different - he likes to party and attend discos, I like to stay at home and wait for Kpop videos. I would end up hurt and anyway - with or without relationship.